People stop thinking and the ship starts sinking…

Posts tagged ‘size’

Have You Noticed How Big It Is?

If you understood the title in a sexual way then you have a dirty mind. In our everyday life there are certain things which grow, or are originally big without us noticing it. They are of a mediocre importance, but once their size is noticed, it is practically impossible to ignore them.

The first example that comes to my mind as an originally large item is the driver’s license. To be honest, as I passed the test and the license was handed to me I thought it was kind of a diploma that came along, to hang on the dining room wall or something.  But the regular size card I was expecting never came, leaving me with this poster and a wallet which seemed narrower than ever.

In order not to jump from one subject to another, I will talk about another item which fits the theme. Who of us hasn’t struggled to fit the LL100,000 paper in our wallet? Who of us hasn’t suffered the curse of having the top of our LL50,000 wrinkled? Why does it have to be that big? Do we have so many trees that we don’t know how to get rid of them?

Recently it has been pointed out to me that the lasting hours of a miscellaneous deodorant seem to grow excessively. They say that it can last for 72 hours, but I don’t know a single person that can go 3 days without showering. Why don’t they make it last 36 hours or 24 hours and make it cheaper? It will be a winning situation for both parties. I foresee a future where this conversation may actually take place:

Mom: Elie !! resh deodorant !! sorna bi kanoun !!!
Elie: bass Mom, rechet bil sayfiye! Ma ba2a me7erze…

(P.S. this paragraph is to remind some people of this marvelous creation called deodorant; for in this hot summer I am seriously doubting the fact that everybody knows about this tremendous breakthrough)

Another growth pattern that is being ignored is the number of singers present on the Lebanese scene. But these increasing numbers create a fierce competition where the voice of the contestant is a major detail.

If you are a woman, you need to have a beautiful body and absolutely no self-dignity (the second one is a must in order to make it in the business). They are ready to suck on every producer’s “microphone” if he can get them on stage.
If you are a man, all you need is a good publicist and a catchy name, such as Amir, or Wael, …

In conclusion, we are living in a small country where the only thing bigger than the items I have stated is the lies we are being fed on a daily basis.